I was asked to
preach recently with the theme, what is our calling in life? It all sounds
rather grand, and it's the sort of thing that you'd expect a 'church minister'
to talk about. But in truth it's a key question for us all. What are the things
that makes life feel meaningful and good? What gets us out of bed in the
morning? (For me this is basically nothing... I am NOT a morning person, I only
feel called to more bed in the morning!!)
Of course our
calling depends on the stage of life we are at. But I do think there are some
principles. Strangely I would summarise these as fun and friendship! For
instance a child at school is called to have fun. Now I realise that they also
need to learn stuff, but relationships and friendships and family are often the
key that unlocks fulfilment and potential. When kids aren't enjoying life,
something is seriously wrong. Indeed I
would add that for all of us a massive part of our calling is to love and enjoy
those around us. While I don't like some of the nuances that attend the phrase,
'charity begins at home' (it may begin there but for most it shouldn't end
there!) certainly it is true that a big part of our calling is to love and
enjoy our friendships, families and work colleagues. Doing stuff that we enjoy
is great, but if we do stuff we enjoy and help someone else as well, isn't that
a double blessing?
I suspect most would
agree with this, but perhaps you think that this doesn't sound like a very
'grand' calling. Surely as a minister I should be 'saving' something or
someone! Well in my view no one ever got saved without friendship. Friends,
real friends help us to discover who we are and unlock our often hidden
aptitudes. To cherish the people around you and invest in them becoming their
best, is at the heart of our calling. If you want to think deeper then these
ideas of friendship are mirrored in the best understandings of faith. The first
statement from the Westminster Confession 1647, a very ancient 'confession'
from my faith tradition, asks: 'What is the chief and highest end of man?
Answer: Man’s chief and highest end is to glorify God, and fully to enjoy him
forever.' Obviously here the friendship and enjoyment is with God rather than
with people, but it is definitely about enjoyment and relationship. I suspect
for some readers the idea of 'enjoying' God may seem strange. This deeply
saddens me. A bit like when people describe a friend or a person that we love
in derogatory terms... We want to add, 'but you don't know them like I do.' The
trouble is, those of us who claim to know God, haven't really presented God
very favourably. We've often forgotten to enjoy life ourselves, like a marriage
hanging together by the finger nails we've replaced joy and laughter and love
with duties and a charade. It can look solid on the outside, but inside it's
become empty.
The story I was
asked to preach on about calling is the story of two sisters, Mary and Martha.
Jesus the famous preacher and healer came to their house. They were thrilled,
Mary sat like a disciple at his feet and listened to his stories, Martha on the
other hand set to getting everything ready for dinner. Then she lost it and
complained to Jesus. 'Tell my sister to help me' she said. But Jesus was pretty
harsh with her, he said 'that she was always distracted by many things, only
one thing is needed and Mary has chosen rightly.' (Spoiler alert... Later on
when their brother Lazarus dies... The roles are almost reversed and Martha is
the one who shows faith.)
So what does Jesus
mean by the 'one thing that is needed?' I suspect he means friendship with God.
Mary was looking for this, Martha was just busy and so missed an opportunity.
At another time Jesus summed up all Jewish teaching and rules by saying Love the
Lord your God with all your heart, soul, mind and strength, and love your
neighbour as yourself. What he was saying was, a relationship with God and a
kindness towards others, is the place to start... That's the reason we clean
the house or share our food, so that we can enjoy the company. Not so we look
good on the outside.
I realise some
struggle to understand and grasp the whole relationship with God idea. I
suppose that is understandable, especially when we have often painted God in
such an unfriendly light. However, I argue that we discover our true calling in
radical friendship. Perhaps if I paint friendship with God, as friendship with
the world he has made, some will find that easier. We discover ourselves when
we offer friendship to whatever and whoever God places in front of us,
especially when that friendship takes on the form of going the extra mile, or
turning the other cheek, or dancing with joy at a beautiful sunset, or choosing
to live more gently in our world.
So discover your
calling in life by developing your friendships.. Enjoy them, cherish them, be
interested in them. What better time to do that than over the summer. Why not
go the extra mile and invite someone round, share a drink, enjoy a few laughs.
If you know someone isolated or lonely pop over or send a card, and dare I say
it, have a think is their something that you can enjoy about God or his
wonderful world... If so... Enjoy it!
Stephen Newell
